Source: http://happinessblog.com/2011/aim-for-happiness/
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Monday, March 31, 2014
Aim For Happiness
Our Aim Determines Our Achievements If you want to be happy or happier, make happiness and enjoying life your goals. Whatever you have to do, try to enjoy it!� Find ways to make ALL your activities enjoyable, rewarding and meaningful. Make Doing Well AND Feeling Well Your Top Personal Priorities Expect to enjoy everything you […]
Famous Insults
"A vain, giddy, shallow, humorous youth!" - Shakespeare, Henry V, 2. 4 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/EMZDvtat6e0/shakespeare_insults_quotes.shtml
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Funny Quotes
"Give a man a free hand and he�ll try to put it all over you." -- Mae West 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/txwdt6RK5Gg/funny_quotes.shtml
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Love Quotes
"Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be." -- Robert Browning 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/7gEYn9TnIn8/love_quotes.shtml
Love Quotes
"For, you see, each day I love you more, Today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow." -- Rosemonde Gerard 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/7gEYn9TnIn8/love_quotes.shtml
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Jul 4, Miracles are Everywhere
Miracles are Everywhere yet often perceived as being some supernatural and extraordinarily pleasing event. Look below the surface and you'll SEE-Really SEE All of Life for The Miracle That it Truly Is
Source: http://www.abundance-and-happiness.com/miracles-are-everywhere.html
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Insulting Quotes
"An ass-head, and a coxcomb, and a knave, a thin-faced knave, a gull." - Shakespeare, Twelfth Night, 5. 1 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/EMZDvtat6e0/shakespeare_insults_quotes.shtml
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Sunday, March 30, 2014
How to Help Kids Adjust to College
In the last few weeks I?ve received dozens of tearful calls and panicky emails from parents whose children are off at college for the first time?and aren?t adjusting particularly well.
?He calls home several times a day, and feels like he doesn?t have any friends even though he?s playing lacrosse and has joined a fraternity,? one parent lamented. ?Even though she?s doing everything right, she just texted me that she wakes up every morning feeling like she wants to cry,? wrote another.
Here?s the thing: It is totally normal for this major transition to be VERY DIFFICULT, especially if you?ve never been on your own before. Navigating making friends and living without family for the first time can be very hard. And that is okay. Kids usually survive the difficulty and discomfort; most grow dramatically because of it.
Tempted to go visit? Bring them home for a weekend?
Think twice before rescuing college students from the difficult emotions that they are facing (anxiety, homesickness, loneliness, etc.). Although their pain often becomes our pain, and we want to do anything that we can to eliminate it, we can actually prolong their pain when we don?t let them struggle through it. Kids learn three things when we try to take away their pain and discomfort:
1) It must be really awful to feel difficult things (i.e., homesickness). This isn?t true. Life is full of difficult emotions; most pass uneventfully. Difficult emotions are not necessarily traumatic, scarring, unnatural?or even to be avoided.
2) They must not be able to handle their difficult emotions on their own. This probably is true if they?ve never handled them independently in the past. Kids who always have problems solved for them don?t know how to solve problems themselves.
3) They are entitled to a life free from pain or difficulty. This is a pernicious (if unconscious) learned belief. No one is entitled to a life free from adversity. Kids need to learn to tolerate uncomfortable transitions, challenges, boredom and the like because life is full of them.
What to do instead of trying to rescue them
Instead of trying to mask or take away kids? pain, we can help them feel more comfortable with discomfort by encouraging them to ACCEPT their difficult feelings. Here are four ways to do that.
1. Recognize that their emotions are real?then coach them through them. The key is not to deny what they are feeling (e.g., by saying something like, ?But you have so many new friends!? when they say that they are lonely). Instead, encourage kids to lean into their feelings, even if they are painful. Ask them to narrate what they are going through, without exaggerating or sugar-coating it. ?I?m feeling anxious right now,? they might say, or ?I?m not sure why I feel stressed and nervous.? Encourage them to hang in there with unpleasant emotions. See if they can objectify their feelings. Ask, ?Where in your body do you feel anxious/lonely/homesick/sad? Does the feeling have a color? A texture? A shape??
2. Don?t encourage kids to distract themselves from their difficult emotions before they?ve acknowledged them. Leaning on numbing behaviors (drinking, going home, spending hours on Facebook, eating junk food) tends to prolong both the transition and the difficult emotions.
3. Practice self-compassion and kindness. A new study shows that college students who are kind to themselves and accept that their difficult feelings are part of the universal experience of leaving home fare better than those who are critical of themselves. Self-compassionate students are less prone to homesickness and depression, and they tend to me more satisfied with their social lives and choice of college.
4. Finally, encourage kids not to compare themselves to other people! Everyone makes transitions differently. If they spend time on Facebook, they will likely end up feeling like everyone else is having more fun than them. I?ve never seen anyone post a selfie on FB or Instagram looking miserable with the update ?I spent the last hour crying because I miss my mom so much.? Remind kids that social media is, for most people, a giant performance where they posture to make themselves look better than they actually feel.
While it?s true that a happy life comes from positive emotions, it also comes from resilience?from having the tools we need to cope with life?s inevitable difficulties and painful moments. Like it or not, we tend to develop the skills we need to cope with homesickness only when we need them: when we?re away from home for the first time.
Are your kids away at college? What has helped them adjust?
Become a fan of Raising Happiness on Facebook.
Follow Christine Carter on Twitter
Subscribe to the Happiness Matters Podcast on iTunes.
Sign up for the Raising Happiness CLASS!
?He calls home several times a day, and feels like he doesn?t have any friends even though he?s playing lacrosse and has joined a fraternity,? one parent lamented. ?Even though she?s doing everything right, she just texted me that she wakes up every morning feeling like she wants to cry,? wrote another.
Here?s the thing: It is totally normal for this major transition to be VERY DIFFICULT, especially if you?ve never been on your own before. Navigating making friends and living without family for the first time can be very hard. And that is okay. Kids usually survive the difficulty and discomfort; most grow dramatically because of it.
Tempted to go visit? Bring them home for a weekend?
Think twice before rescuing college students from the difficult emotions that they are facing (anxiety, homesickness, loneliness, etc.). Although their pain often becomes our pain, and we want to do anything that we can to eliminate it, we can actually prolong their pain when we don?t let them struggle through it. Kids learn three things when we try to take away their pain and discomfort:
1) It must be really awful to feel difficult things (i.e., homesickness). This isn?t true. Life is full of difficult emotions; most pass uneventfully. Difficult emotions are not necessarily traumatic, scarring, unnatural?or even to be avoided.
2) They must not be able to handle their difficult emotions on their own. This probably is true if they?ve never handled them independently in the past. Kids who always have problems solved for them don?t know how to solve problems themselves.
3) They are entitled to a life free from pain or difficulty. This is a pernicious (if unconscious) learned belief. No one is entitled to a life free from adversity. Kids need to learn to tolerate uncomfortable transitions, challenges, boredom and the like because life is full of them.
What to do instead of trying to rescue them
Instead of trying to mask or take away kids? pain, we can help them feel more comfortable with discomfort by encouraging them to ACCEPT their difficult feelings. Here are four ways to do that.
1. Recognize that their emotions are real?then coach them through them. The key is not to deny what they are feeling (e.g., by saying something like, ?But you have so many new friends!? when they say that they are lonely). Instead, encourage kids to lean into their feelings, even if they are painful. Ask them to narrate what they are going through, without exaggerating or sugar-coating it. ?I?m feeling anxious right now,? they might say, or ?I?m not sure why I feel stressed and nervous.? Encourage them to hang in there with unpleasant emotions. See if they can objectify their feelings. Ask, ?Where in your body do you feel anxious/lonely/homesick/sad? Does the feeling have a color? A texture? A shape??
2. Don?t encourage kids to distract themselves from their difficult emotions before they?ve acknowledged them. Leaning on numbing behaviors (drinking, going home, spending hours on Facebook, eating junk food) tends to prolong both the transition and the difficult emotions.
3. Practice self-compassion and kindness. A new study shows that college students who are kind to themselves and accept that their difficult feelings are part of the universal experience of leaving home fare better than those who are critical of themselves. Self-compassionate students are less prone to homesickness and depression, and they tend to me more satisfied with their social lives and choice of college.
4. Finally, encourage kids not to compare themselves to other people! Everyone makes transitions differently. If they spend time on Facebook, they will likely end up feeling like everyone else is having more fun than them. I?ve never seen anyone post a selfie on FB or Instagram looking miserable with the update ?I spent the last hour crying because I miss my mom so much.? Remind kids that social media is, for most people, a giant performance where they posture to make themselves look better than they actually feel.
While it?s true that a happy life comes from positive emotions, it also comes from resilience?from having the tools we need to cope with life?s inevitable difficulties and painful moments. Like it or not, we tend to develop the skills we need to cope with homesickness only when we need them: when we?re away from home for the first time.
Are your kids away at college? What has helped them adjust?
Become a fan of Raising Happiness on Facebook.
Follow Christine Carter on Twitter
Subscribe to the Happiness Matters Podcast on iTunes.
Sign up for the Raising Happiness CLASS!
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/berkeley/MMpu/~3/tXHzvIyFJKI/how_to_help_kids_adjust_to_college
Shakespeare Insults
"A tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing." - Shakespeare, Macbeth, 5. 5 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/EMZDvtat6e0/shakespeare_insults_quotes.shtml
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Dec 31, The Power of Being
If You're Doing Much But Are Consistently Getting, Having and/or Settling For Less Than You Truly Desire, Perhaps It's Time To Consciously, Intentionally and Purposefully Initiate The Power of Being
Source: http://www.abundance-and-happiness.com/power-of-being.html
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Happiness Habits for Veterans
“Can you help me?” is a frequent response from veterans when I mention Happiness Habit skills. Here are highlights of what I say… Wrap the Pain In Love – Remember what a big, warm, loving hug feels like?� Whenever you need it, give yourself a big hug and wrap your pain, fear and bad memories […]
Source: http://happinessblog.com/2011/happiness-habits-for-veterans/
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Sexy Quotes
"Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex." -- Barbara Cartland 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/uB4SAoxE9pg/sex_quotes.shtml
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Greatest Romantic Quotes
"Brief is life but love is long." - Alfred Lord Tennyson 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/7gEYn9TnIn8/love_quotes.shtml
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Saturday, March 29, 2014
Stupid Quotes
"I admit it, I am not one of the great linguists." - George W Bush 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/OxzHq2LgWK8/stupid_quotes.shtml
Sex Quotes
"I have an intense desire to return to the womb. Anybody's." -- Woody Allen 
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AllGreatQuotes/~3/uB4SAoxE9pg/sex_quotes.shtml
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